In a nutshell resilience is the ability to bounce back, the capacity to bring out the best in you during the worst of times and where difficult situations are perceived as “not so difficult”.
People who are resilient have a greater comfort zone and some actually thrive on challenge. Others are flexible and creative during adversity.
Their moto could be instead of Try Harder
is Try Different
This is where my focus is going to be. After all, Einsteins definition of insanity was “to keep doing the same thing and expect different results”
How many times do we say (shout!) “put your shoes on” with no response?
Time to try doing things a little differently me thinks
Imagine your brain is like a motorway. There’s no satnav so you just keep taking the same road as it;
Feels familiar and is safe
Will get you to your destination (eventually)
You can drive there without thinking
We may even get ourselves a satnav, but initially we may not trust it when it tells us to go up an unknown little country lane. No, I’m going to go the way I know you say to it.
You are likely to be like that reading my suggestions on how to be different. It’s just not comfortable to do things in a different way
Yet we often just keep going down that same road when there are other options.
So with no further ado here are some suggestions:
Be playful with the ideas, experiment and invent your won. Good Luck!
Shout, cajole, drag, ignore Tickle, stroke head, read some jokes, give instructions in a funny voice
You get angry and smack Have an elastic band on your wrist you snapYou get angry and slam doors
They get angry and slam doors Punch a pillow
They are mean to the cat Have an old toy cat they can pull apart
You swear Have a few mantras on post it notes (see below)
Focus on what they’re doing wrong Play to everyones strengths and notice those
Getting onto an argument Blow a whistle and have a break from it
Imagining the worst Break it down into manageable chunks
Feeling guilty, useless, Acceptance of own limitations and vulnerabilities
Childs behaviour is just too much Pattern interrupt with a crazy distraction
Don’t add fuel to the fire
Less said more peace
Take a chill pill
This wont matter 5 years from now
"I think it is a well done course and will benefit many parents out there. I loved the section on attachment styles, understanding the child's behaviours from a multi-sensory point of view and the natural remedies you talk about, particularly as I am a paediatric physiotherapist and while I am aware of all these things, perhaps a lot of laypeople are blissfully unaware of the simple but VERY important aspects of child development and how important simple touch can be to a child having difficulties."
- Julinie Mohamad Nasir -
Member of the International Stress Management Association
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